Are you ready for the bittersweet journey of preparing your teen for independence?
I mean, it’s already mid-December (nearly)!
It also means your high schoolers are getting ready to go to college next year.
It’s such a big step for them and you. It’s a beautiful phase of parents learning and embracing to let go, while the younger ones are preparing to spread their wings and soar into the big unknown.
Happy, sad, proud, anxious, nervous, scared, excited, curious, worried, and the list of emotions can go on yet not explain what each of you is feeling.
The best thing to do is focus on preparing the children, or the young adults, the 9 life skills they need to learn to make their transition easy.
They will be better prepared to manage on their own if they’re well equipped with knowledge which only you can teach them.
Let’s start before the year ends as we sit discussing what to teach.
1. Time Management
With no longer the parents acting as the backup alarm clocks or personal assistants, the young adults have to learn to manage time.
School, classes, assignments, extra-curricular activities, social engagements, and personal time – all need to be fitted into the daily schedule.
Time management skills are essential to master because these are for life, beyond the campus and into their professional lives.
What To Do:
– Get them to use planners or digital tools. I’m sure they’re well aware of a few.
– Show them how to prioritise responsibilities. Use techniques like the Eisenhower Matrix.
– Encourage them to set daily and weekly goals.
2. Basic Cooking Skills
Food. Like it or not this is more than essential; it’s survival.
By learning how to cook they’ll learn about making simple meals for themselves, know the effort that goes into it, learn to plan for it and also the cost of various things.
If they’re able to cook, it will make them more confident about managing on their own with the available resources.
What To Do:
– Begin with teaching easy recipes like scrambled eggs, pasta, or sandwiches.
– Teach them how to use the various appliances like microwave and stovetops.
– Let them plan the meals and do grocery shopping.
– Get them to understand the nutritional requirements and reading the labels.
3. Financial Literacy
Learning about budgeting and saving teaches them something which years of staying at home didn’t – how to make well thought out financial decisions all by themselves.
This life skill will help them as they grow up and have to manage their finances as adults.
What To Do:
– Ask them to manage their allowance, including budgeting, savings, spending, and giving.
– Introduce them to basic banking concepts, like deposits and withdrawals.
– Explain the difference between wants and needs, discretionary spending and essential purchases.
4. Conflict Resolution
Once out of the safe confines of the house, they will have to learn to get along with others.
Disagreements are inevitable. Learning to handle conflicts constructively gives them an advantage. They can build stronger connections, develop emotional resilience, and a positive mindset.
What To Do:
– Insist they practice calm and respectful communication during disagreements.
– Role-play scenarios and ask them to find solutions.
– Teach them to build empathy and accepting responsibility instead of blaming others.
5. Emotional Regulation
You can teach all you can but when they find themselves in a new place, with new people around, navigating new circumstances all by themselves, it can get a little overwhelming,
Teach them how to manage their emotions effectively, how to deal with stress, and how to manage challenges calmly and in a level headed manner.
What To Do:
– You’re just a phone call away. Let them call you regularly till they settle down.
– Share stories of how you handle your own emotions.
– Encourage them to go out and make new friends, join clubs or activity groups to keep them productively engaged.
6. Personal Hygiene and Self-Care
No Mama to nag about washing up or providing fresh clothes now.
So, instil the habits for maintaining good personal hygiene. Stress on the need to follow them for maintaining good health.
Remind them that their personal grooming (and not bottles of deodorants) will boost their confidence and impact their social interactions.
What To Do:
– Insist on daily hygiene routines, like brushing teeth, bathing, and grooming.
– Ask them to maintain clean surroundings. Begin with their rooms.
– Let them prepare their own self-care kit or set up a reminder.
7. Critical Thinking and Decision-Making
Work on developing their critical thinking and decision making skills. They will empower them to analyse the situations they find themselves in, weigh in the available options, and finally make the well informed decisions only they can.
They will have to rely on themselves to think and act from now on.
What To Do:
– Ask open-ended questions, like What if…?, instead of providing with solutions.
– Teach them to research before forming opinions or making decisions.
8. Teamwork and Collaboration
Working together on group projects or assignments changes from what they are used to.
It’s no longer about friends forming the group. They can no longer choose who they want to work with.
They’ve to learn to work well with others, adapt to the changing relationship equations, build empathy, and work on their leadership skills. It’s a life skill which will help them even in their professional space.
What To Do:
– Encourage them to participate in group projects or team sports at school.
– involve them in problem-solving during family activities.
– Talk to them about the value of respecting and being open to diverse perspectives.
9. Basic Household Management
And finally, teach them the basics of household management. Making their bed, paying the bills, managing their chores, all of it.
This is what will make their daily life comfortable and easy. It will make them genuinely independent.
What To Do:
– Teach them to do laundry, clean their room, and manage basic repairs.
– Assign chores and insist on them on completing them.
BONUS Skill – Digital Literacy and Networking Basics
I don’t mean their proficiency at social media; but something more productive and constructive.
It will help them with improving their academic performance and but also set the foundation for preparing for their career and personal growth.
What To Do:
- Teach them how to write proper professional emails, with appropriate etiquettes.
- Get them familiar with tools like Google Workspace (Docs, Sheets, Slides) or Microsoft Office.
- Show them how to research and validate information, spot misinformation and optimally make use of academic database.
- Show them how to build professional profiles and relationships online.
Conclusion
There’s a check list for parents to keep track of the progress they’ve made in teaching these essential skills to their teens.
It’s not enough that they get into a college; what will make the college life memorable is when they’re able to enjoy it.
And that’s possible only if they’re prepared for it.
It’s become a lot more convenient now. But moving away from home still needs some preparation.
What they learn now will remain with them for life. It’s your gift to them. So, teach them well.
Start small, be consistent and celebrate their progress, for each victory matters as it builds them into confident and independent adults.
