The best proof of love is trust.
But, have you explained the meaning of trust to your child? Do it if you haven’t. It’s one of the pillars of a healthy and positive mindset, reflects a confident personality, and is a valuable asset.
Seen how a baby feels secure in the arms of parent? How a child runs to the parent when hurt? It’s instinctive.
They trust you. They know they’ll be taken care of; they know they’re safe.
We all seek it in our relationships, be it personal, professional or platonic.
But how do you explain it to a child? And more importantly, how do you build a relationship based on trust with them?
Trust isn’t something that can be built in a day or over a weekend. It has to be nurtured slowly, one step at a time, with each meaningful action of yours.
The invisible threads of trust bind the parents and children. It’s built with love and care and security.
It creates a space where children feel safe to express themselves without any worry or fear, where they’re heard and valued, feel confident about themselves.
The trust of the parent is what empowers them to go forth.
But it’s taken so much for granted that it’s often ignored. Don’t make that mistake.
Trust may be instinctive but it needs to be nurtured intentionally.
Use this 6 steps to build a relationship based on trust with your child.
Steps to Build Trust Between Parents and Children
1. Be Consistent and Reliable
The children look up to you. Be conscious of that before committing yourself to something or making lofty promises.
You don’t want to break your promise or look suspect every time you retract on your commitment.
That can break the trust they’ve in you, erode your credibility.
Always, always, align your words with your actions.
If it looks un-doable or you don’t want to promise them something, be honest and say so. There may be a few tears or drama but that’s temporary.
They’ll appreciate your honesty and that’s a desirable outcome in the long run.
2. Practice Active Listening
Let the child be heard without interruptions. This builds their confidence in themselves.
Instead of getting impatient with their constant ramblings, look at it this way – they feel safe to speak their mind in your presence, trust you to accept it without prejudice.
That’s a privilege; don’t lose it.
It builds a strong bond between you and your child if the child knows that they’re not going to be ridiculed or laughed at or dismissed every time they speak.
Earn their trust by listening to them.
3. Admit Your Mistakes
You’re the parent, but you’re also human.
Admit your mistake and apologise for it. This will only make them respect your more. Also, they’ll feel confident that you trust them enough to admit your mistakes.
By allowing them to see you as a human, as someone who can also falter, they learn to trust you more.
Use this opportunity to teach them about humility and accountability. Let them learn to take ownership of their actions and their consequences.
And more importantly, teach them how to apologise sincerely. Not a fake ‘Sorry’ but something meaningful.
4. Encourage Independence
If you want your child to learn something well, then let them learn from their own experience.
Give them a chance to make decisions. They’ll learn better from their outcomes. Works much better than telling them something repeatedly.
Trust them when they want to do something. It shows you’ve confidence in their abilities and capabilities.
And by being there for them, you’re reinforcing that trust in them. They trust you to be there and you’re there.
5. Be Transparent About Expectations
Trust is built on honesty, and any strong relationship is dependent on honesty.
Be sure that they understand this clearly.
Set clear boundaries and expectations. Explain the reasons for that so they know the ‘why’.
Once they understand this, they’ll appreciate it better. They’ll know the consequence of crossing the line is breaking the trust you have in them.
This is vital for them to understand since it will apply to all relations they’ll form in future.
6. Show Unconditional Love
Trust is based on unconditional love, and not on achievements and success. They need to understand this well.
Trust is based on how both the parents and the child conduct themselves, their behaviour and attitude.
It’s a space where the individual, child or parent, is most valued, not their achievements or awards. Celebrate their efforts, not just their grades or prizes.
When the child understands this, they’ll strive to be better person. Someone who is trustworthy and reliable.
In Summary
Trust is as fragile as its strong.
It gives the child the confidence and strength to be themselves, drawing from the unwavering support and love of those who believe in them.
Yet one little misstep or mistake can cause a crack in this relationship.
Teach them the significance of building the relationship based on trust. It’s essential for their social and emotional well-being.
Like it or not but trust is the glue that holds the relationship together. Your child feels reassured that no matter what, they’ve a safe haven in you.
Who wouldn’t want the security of having someone they can trust on their side?
