There is no escaping this one job – making a choice.
Eat or drink? Play or study? Sleep late or wake up early? Take a vacation now or later? Read a book or watch Netflix?
The list can go on and on, and still not cover all the options each of us face daily in our lives.
Either you make the choice yourself or someone else makes it for you. That’s also a choice.
But somewhere within that vast ocean of mundane choices are also choices that have a deep impact on you. And only you should have to choose. Or else someone else will.
Your values, your beliefs, your thoughts, even how you want to spend your time.
If you don’t decide what you choose to follow then life has a way of filling those empty spaces. It allows others to decide for you.
Not maliciously, not always intentionally, but simply because there can’t be blank spaces in your life.
Now it’s your choice. Do you want to fill those empty spaces with what truly matters to you, or with handouts from others’ decisions based on their priorities?
The Cost of Not Choosing
That cost is unseen but huge.
Think of that day when you chose to scroll endlessly rather than decide how to spend your time. Wasted precious opportunities.
Or when you chose to nod and go along with the majority rather than voicing your own opinion because it was the easier way out.
Or when you chose to stick to the beaten track shown by your parents and teachers and well-wishers instead of pursuing your passion because making your own choice felt like too much work.
Decision made, you walked away. But how did you feel – satisfied with your choices or vaguely unsettled since it’s not what you wanted?
Neglecting to choose shapes your identity as much as your active choices.
Over years, not choosing becomes your default mode. until one day you find yourself crushed under these choices. That’s when you realise that you’ve been living by a script that isn’t yours.
Can you still do anything?
Consumption Is Direction
To stay alert, you need to keep working that brain of yours. Because what you read, watch or listen today shapes your thinking pattern, preparing you for tomorrow.
Surround yourself with curiosity or creativity or resilience, and you’ll feel inspired. Your perspective shifts.
Binge on insipid, mind numbing reels, or follow outrage and cynicism, and you’ll find yourself echoing them.
The choice is yours.
It’s not about wasting time. It’s about who you’re choosing to become through those choices you’re making. Some consciously, some not.
It’s Not An Easy Choice
I agree. You can’t make all the choices. Sometimes, or rather most of the times, others will have a say.
It gets rather exhausting when you’ve to be deliberate always. Sometimes it’s easiest to surrender to the current instead of fighting it.
But you don’t live in isolation. Family, friends, colleagues, mentors – they all shape you in their own ways. You adopt values and beliefs that aren’t originally yours.
It’s all part of your growth journey.
But you know where the danger lies? Not in the influence itself but in your passivity. When you stop asking if you actually want this as a part of your identity, and letting them define you.
Your choice has to be a conscious decision, not something taken without any thought.
Ask yourself these questions –
- When have I neglected to choose who I want to be?
Which belief, habit, or identity did I adopt without questioning? - What were the repercussions?
Did it align with what I wanted from life or did it take me further away from it? - What small choice today could shift me toward the alignment I desire?
Not a grand, life-altering decision. Just one intentional step.
What Can You Do?
- You can begin with auditing your inputs. Look at your reading list, your Netflix queue, your social feeds.
What are they saying about your choices? Do they reflect who you want to become?
If no, then time to review the choices you’ve made until now.
- Reclaim your time. Block out a small portion of the day that no one else decides for you. Even 15 minutes of deliberate choice allows you the freedom to decide how you want to spend it.
- Your choices define you. For that you have to define your non-negotiables. Write down three values that are important to you, which you won’t compromise on. These become your north star when others try to choose for you.
Final Reflection
The truth is you’re not immune to the external forces. You’re definitely going to imbibe some amount of influence from the people around you.
What the real question you need to ask yourself is how much will you let the others decide for you.
Will you let them write your story or will you hold the pen for at least the parts that matter the most?
Like I said before, whatever you choose is still your choice. Whether you choose your path forward or you choose to go along with others.
The outcome will depend on what you do. Choose wisely.
